Monday, May 11, 2009

Good morning my bloggy friends! I hope those of you who are mothers, had a wonderful mother's day! I surely did - I'm one spoiled mama!

On Friday I had a friend stop by and could tell that she had been crying when I saw her face. She explained that her best friend's daughter had been killed in an auto accident the night before. Since she had helped care for this girl for 16 years, her heart was broken and she just couldn't understand why it had happened. She said she came to me because she wanted me to help her understand why. My heart ached for her, I wanted to help and comfort her but I had no explanation for why. As I told her that God's ways are not our ways and that we must trust that He knows better than we do, I hugged her tightly and desperately wanted to take her pain away.

Lately, God has been prompting me to immediately pray with people instead of just telling them I will be praying for them. At times I have obeyed and I'm ashamed to say at others I have not. As I tried to comfort this woman, my heart said pray - pray for and with her right now. My mind began justifying why I shouldn't. "I don't know where her faith is - what if she says no when I ask her to pray with me - what if she thinks I'm crazy - what if it makes her not like me anymore?" all ran through my mind.

It was time for her to leave and I said "I'll be praying for you and your friend's family."

As I watched her walk to her car, my heart sank. Once again, I had disobeyed. Once again, I had failed. Once again, I was asking God to forgive me.

My selfishness, my pride - I got in the way.

I wondered to myself, how can I tell God that I want to do His will and then when He tells me His will, I disobey?

I know that I have been forgiven but the conviction my heart feels will motivate me to do better next time and say YES to whatever it is that God places on my heart.

Have a great day


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